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Average Joe says:
August 14, 2010 at 12:14 pm
“Just want to say thank you for your excellent advice to the women here – it’s both strategic and empathic”.
@Susan
Thank you for the website. Similar advice when shared on the feminist blogs too often got me digitally lynched. I have noticed things are different here and that as a whole the community is open minded, wants to grow, and has their collective hearts in the right place. I think that is just awesome. It is truly a pleasure to feel I am helping.
Clarence says:
August 14, 2010 at 2:49 pm
Susan@9:07:
I just want to say that I agree. I can’t speak for all men, obviously, but to me it’s the pattern of her hookups (more so than how many) and how she treats the men in her life (an excellent piece of advice for both men and women is to ask how does the one you are infatuated with treat the members of your sex in his or her life? How do they treat weaker people?)that I judge a woman on. Given certain circumstances I could see going for a woman who has two or three times my “number” , given other circumstances, I might turn down someone who has only had one sex partner if I smell trouble ahead. Men are, as you’ve noted concerned with cheating and cuckoldry, moreso than probably anything else except maybe a false accusation.
So, I do feel confident stating this:
Though men vary in their desires, MOST men (except very religious on average) will judge more on background than number, but of course a good background is bound to keep the number rather low for the most part, say 20 or less for a 30 year old barring exceptional circumstances. other men may think it’s 10 or less, please remember its not the number, its what is behind it and many men will disagree as to what number one needs to “worry” the woman about. Men who are looking for LTR DO worry about “bonding” and most of do worry that the larger the number of her lovers the more chance we’ll bore her and come up short in some way. In other words, either she’ll be content to marry us, but after the kids pop out no sex, or she’ll cheat on us. After all, while I can lose weight and bulk up, I can’t become 6 foot 4 with eyes of brightest azure and a beautiful Spanish accent. And of course STD’s etc, that everyone with basic sex ed knows about.
Jeffrey of Troy says:
August 14, 2010 at 4:33 pm
So, it seems that “sex-positive feminism” is just some of the promiscuous women wanting all the benefits of being promiscuous AND all the benefits of not being promiscuous, without the costs of either.